I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

My Lady works in DC and has ash blonde hair which reaches her shoulder blades. It is soft and beautiful in spite of the fact that the color is L'Oreal. She is 62 and I love her with all my heart.

So, what is the problem?

She has recently been saying that she is thinking of cutting her hair to a short style more conducive to business image requirements she feels DC dictates.

I love this woman, but would be lying if I said her cutting her hair short would not break my heart. I avoid discussing it with her as she always gets defensive, insisting that I should love her regardless of hair length. I have tried to tell her that I am not saying our relationship is dependant on her hairstyle.........I will never leave her.........BUT........I would be a liar if I denied that her ignoring my love of her long hair would hurt me deeply.

Am I just being selfish? I really need your advice. Should I resign myself to the inevitable or are there ways to convince to leave it long?

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

I don't think it's selfish... it's just what you prefer. You are not saying you would love her any less if she were to cut her hair, rather you are simply saying you prefer it long.

I have really long hair and my husband doesn't hide the fact that he prefers my hair long. I know if I were to cut my hair that my husband would still love me just as much ane find me just as beautiful. However, I value his opinion and would never cut my hair.

In the same respect... he knows that I prefer his hair to be very short and for him to always be clean-shaven. So he does that for me.

Talk about it with her and tell her how you feel. The best policy is to always be honest and most certainly to always communicate with your partner.

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

Yes you are being a bit selfish. You will get used to the short hair, and regardless of whether you liked it long better, it is not your place to choose her hair length.

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

Short hair can beautiful, especially on older women. Yes, you are being selfish. If you even think of leaving her over this....do you really love her?!

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

Ask her to sleep on it,she is obviously not thinking deeply about cutting her hair,be honest about your feelings and encourage her to leave it long,there is no reason she has to cut her hair to look more buisness like,just putting up in a bun will do.Besides long hair is the trade mark of natural feminity.there are lots of long hair support groups online.Like longhairluvers.

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

Yes, that is selfish. Professional career woman normally would have shorter than shoulder length hair because of the profile it creates for them. It does look MUCH neater and cared for which tells alot about the woman. So, I would suggest, as a business woman myself, bite your tongue and try it out....let her cut it the way she feels necessary and IT WILL GROW back I am sure. If you absolutely don't like it after the first cut, talk to her about it and maybe she can try a different style next time. Please love her anyway and you never know, she may be sexier to you with a shorter hair do.....good luck!

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

I think she is the one being selfish. if she told you she liked your face clean shaven, wouldn't you go shave it?

I think that she just doesn't want to deal with her hair anymore. ultimately it is her choice, but maybe ask her to not cut it too short, and that way she can still get it cut.

maybe you should suggest finding some hair styles that would look just as professional with out her having to cut her hair. ways to put it up, I mean.

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

Selfish,.. maybe,... but maybe you should explain to her just how much her hair gets you... ya know?

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

let her choose what she wants to do. when she gets her haircut then you should tell her the truth

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

well u know it will always grow back

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

You should love her for her not her hair, what if she had cancer and lost her hair, would you love her any less?

I know this is going to sound selfish, but I cannot help it?

Yea, you might be a little selfish on this one, but let's just put that aside and adress your concerns. You say her hair is not an issue, and yet it is the reason for your post. However, you also said that she is cutting her hair to fit a business profile. What you did not adress, however, is how SHE likes her hair. If she likes it long, but is concerned about certain "standards" than your opinion should definately count here. My husband's opinions about my looks are more important to me than anyone's. He is who I want to look good for.

Perhaps there is a compromise here. There are many hairstyles for long hair that are professional. Her age is going to become more of an issue than the professional standards of DC. Older women typically look older with long hair.

As for your selfishness--That might need a little work. This is typically a conversation I would here from a younger group. Surely you know by now what is REALLY important, and can identify that behavior as distructive to your relationship. I say keep that stuff to yourself and show her the support the woman you love deserves. You may not be able to "help it" but you can keep it quiet.